Friends don’t pressure friends to buy cars

It’s one of those chirpy radio ads that makes my eyes roll out of their sockets.

“You’ve got a ‘friend’ in the business!” the announcer says. “From now till Saturday, you’ll save as though you’ve got a ‘friend in the business’ here at XYZ motors (not their real name) …”

Yes indeed, XYZ motors might be having a sale to end all sales. I can almost buy that one. But the misconception lurking behind this innocent jingle is a philosophical one rather than commercial one.

The implication is that when you have friends or family who are in the car business, you’ll get a terrific deal from them. Maybe yes, but there’s much more to it than that.

In fact, my relatives’ experience has borne out exactly the opposite: they were extremely dissatisfied after buying a car from my cousin in the car biz. How so?

People tend to trust their car-biz contacts too much, lulling the buyers away from doing their homework. So when a pal calculates less-than-bargain prices, you’re more likely to unwittingly blink prettily and say, “Sure.” This is not to say that it’s intentional.

Your friend selling the car – making his or her livelihood doing so, remember – might have some assumptions, too. 

It’s like you’re expecting to get a better deal than you should get, because you’re friends or family, and then the person selling the car is thinking maybe they shouldn’t be asking as much as they want to, because you’re friends.

In short, whoever feels they got the best deal could take a lot of guilt with them. Whoever doesn’t, might feel they were taken advantage of, whether it be the buyer or seller. And that can put a genuine strain on any relationship and becomes even worse when family and friends are involved.

For example, friends of mine approached a relative who sells cars. It’s a long and sordid story, but my friends ended up with a car that was not right for them. And because of the personal relationship, they somehow felt obligated to keep the car when they discovered it didn’t have the key options they thought they were getting.

Despite our pushing (which probably didn’t help), they still wouldn’t discuss the problem with the dealership, who, upon discovering the mix-up, most likely would have fixed the problem somehow. But I guess we’ll never know.

Don’t think of your car salesman as your buddy, even if he or she really is. It’s a business relationship. Do your homework and ask a lot of questions, and you’ll come home satisfied every time – and your friends will stay your friends.